Stuck In An Elevator
by J. B Jazz
Summary: What happens when a disfigured murderer, a beautiful chorus girl, a quiet ballerina, an obnoxious diva, and a fop get stuck in an elevator? Anything...
1. Going Up?

**Chapter One: Going Up?**

(Erik is standing in an elevator, hands together, watching the floors go by)

Erik: God, this music sucks…Why am I stopping?

(The elevator stops and Carlotta strides in)

Erik: (mumbling) Damn…

Carlotta: Tree, pleez.

Erik: What?...Oh, do you mean the third floor?

Carlotta: Yes, you ideeot!

Erik: mumble mumble…toad…

(He presses button, but is stopped again at another floor…)

Erik: (checking watch) I'm gonna be late… This music is REALLY awful.

Meg: Oh, hello.

(Walks strangely onto the elevator, feet slanted outwards)

Erik: Why do you walk like that?

Meg :(softly) Because it's ballerina-like… walking…Oh! Joel Shumacher made me do it!

Erik and Carlotta: I can't hear you, speak up.

(The elevator stops again…don't worry, I'm going somewhere with this)

Erik: Oh my God. I'm only trying to get to the first floor! I'll Punjab the next person who-

Christine: Hello!

Erik: Never mind.

Raoul: (popping out from behind her) Hiya peoples!

Erik: Crap.

Raoul: AAHHH! Christine, save me! (He hides under her dress)He'll call me a fop!

Christine: No, he won't (She gives Erik a LOOK OF DEATH)

Erik :(crosses fingers) No, I won't.

(The door closes)

Erik: This music is annoying. (To Raoul) I feel the need to be mean to you.

Raoul: Christiiine….

Erik: Fop.

Raoul:(Bouncing up and down and pointing an accusing finger at Erik) He said it!

Christine: Erik!

Erik: Tattle tail!

Raoul:(sticks out tongue)

(Time passes and Raoul notices the buttons)

Raoul: Oooooo….pretty colors… (He presses all of them)

Erik:(standing there, raising an eyebrow)

Raoul: (a la "Elf") It looks like a Christmas tree!

(Suddenly, intense music pours into the elevator as the light flicker on and off and it…STOPS)

Raoul:(jumping into Christine's arms like a familiar cartoon character) Rah! Ristine! Ruh relerator ropped!

Christine: JINKIES!

Carlotta: What 'as 'appened! What eez going on!

Meg: the mumble…. have..mumble…mumble…

All: WHAT!

Meg: (screaming) THE ELEVATOR SEEMS TO HAVE STOPPED!

(Christine screams, Carlotta faints, Meg is gasping for air, and Raoul is…fixing his hair?)

Raoul: Brusha, brusha brusha…

Erik:(covering his ears) I'm surrounded by idiots!(music in elevator grows louder)

SHUT UP!

(Everyone quiets down)

Raoul: Grumble…Stupid knots!

(A/N- Please read and review! This is my first comedy fic. The reason I wrote it was because over the weekend, some hockey players got stuck in an elevator and they had to delay the game to get them out. There were firemen with axes coming into the building. I was screaming to my friend, "They're gonna break down the door!" It was utter panic. Anyway….hope you enjoy it! RR!


	2. Trapped

**Chapter Two: Trapped**

Erik:(grabbing Raoul's brush) Everyone! Stop panicking like chickens with their heads cut off and listen. We are stuck in an elevator-

Raoul :( looking at hair) Stating the obvious… (Erik begins to pull out his Punjab lasso) Go on, Oh Fearless Leader!

Erik: We are stuck in an elevator. Perhaps we could call someone for help.

(Raoul pulls out a cell phone)

Raoul: A _what_ phone?

Authoress: In your pocket, fop!

Erik: Whoohoo, Authoress!

(Raoul puts his hand in his pocket and slowly pulls out his cell phone)

Raoul: I am fascinated…(He fiddles with it and makes caveman noises)

Carlotta: Does he normally do zeez?

Christine:(looks around nervously) Is that a trick question?

(The phone begins to ring… "The Music of the Night" is the ring tone….)

Erik: Hey…That's_ my_ song! They stole my song! (He grabs the phone and answers it) Hello, you've reached The Phantom of the Opera and idiots, except Christine. How may I help you?

Nerdy Voice On Phone: Can you hear me now?

Erik:(awkwardly) Yes. How may I help you sir?

N.V.O.P: Good. Can you hear me now?

Erik:(growing irritated) Yes…How may I help?

N.V.O.P.: Can you hear me…now?

Erik:(angrily) Yes! Listen, we're stuck in an elevator. Can you help-

N.V.O.P.: Can you hear me-

Erik: SHUT UP, YOU IDIOT! I CAN HEAR YOU! I ALWAYS COULD HEAR YOU! AND NOW, WITH YOUR ANNOYING QUESTIONING, I ALWAYS WILL HEAR YOU! AHHH!

(Erik throws the phone to the ground and jumps on it, crushing all hope of emergency contact into a thousand pieces)

Christine: What do you suppose they wanted?

Carlotta: I dona want to knowa.

Raoul: Well, smart one- we've lost all contact with the outside. What do we do now?

Erik:(regaining composure) Well, um-er…Let's all take some time to calm down.

Meg: _We_ have to calm down!...That's just-

(Erik flashes Punjab)

Meg: That sounds delightful! C'mon, let's all have a sit-down!

(Everyone sits down….there is silence…later…)

Raoul: …with the feather on the bird, and the bird in the egg, and the egg in the nest, and the nest on the twig, and the twig on the branch, and the branch on the tree, and the tree in the ground and the green grass grows all around, all around, and the green grass grows all around!(Takes a breath) There was a-

Erik: (praying) …and if you give me Advil, I promise I won't kill the fop!

Christine: (to Raoul) That's enough, sweetheart.

Raoul: But I haven't gotten to the skies…stars…the sun, moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn…uh…

Erik: Uranus.

Raoul: Hahaha! He said Ur-Anus! Hahahaha!

Erik: Poor _fop_, he makes me laugh-

Carlotta: Hahahahaha! Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha-

Erik: I believe I asked for some Advil, Lord.

Raoul: I believe I have some…

Christine: Can I have some, too?

Carlotta: Me tooo?

Meg: Me three?

(They all take some "Advil" and it turns out to be muscle relaxers…Christine is rubbing her face, Carlotta and Meg are doing a sort of limp Macerana, and Erik and Raoul are doing a square dance, singing musical songs)

Authoress: What's going on down there! I demand an exclamation! Erik?

(Erik stares at her for a moment but then slaps his hands on his cheeks and does the whole "Home Alone" screaming thing)

Authoress….Christine? (She notices that Christine is now playing puppets with her hands) Nevermind. Uh, Carlotta?

Carlotta: Zat's Mr. Potato Head to you! (She laughs, snorting)

Authoress: Has everyone gone mad?

Erik and Raoul:

Do you hear the people sing?

Singing the song of angry men

It is the music of a people who will not be slaves again!...

Carlotta and Meg:

Hey, Macarena…uh, dododo Macerana

Macados, dudadudadudadudaduh Macarena-

Chrstine :( to others) SHHHHHHH! (They all fall silent)

It's the last Midnight….

It's the last wish… (They all laugh but are again interrupted by Christine) No wait, seriously guys, I think I hear something!

Erik: (grabbing Christine's ear and screaming into it) HI HO!

(All except Christine laugh as she stumbles for the buttons and presses the one labeled intercom)

Voice: Hello, we've been trying to reach you. Are you all okay?

Christine :(falling to the ground, covering herself) That voice which calls to me!

Raoul: Heggo?

Voice: Um, hello, sir. Are you alright?

(Raoul begins to count people as Erik pushes him out of the way)

Erik: Let me handle this. (speaks into intercom) Yes, I want a Whopper, French fries, and a large Diet Coke!

Voice: Oh, you kids! Always messing with the buttons!

(Silence)

Carlotta: What is a Whoppa?

A/N-Hope you liked it! Vote for more. By the way, I used "Dou You Hear the People Sing?" from Les Miserables and "The Last Midnight" from Into the Woods. And "The Macarena" from crazy people out to annoy the world. If you have some ideas for the next chapter, do tell. REVIEW!


	3. Pujabs and Tutus

First of all…Thanks to all the people who reviewed! And thanks for the great ideas! You have INSPIRED me! Also, if you're in the mood for drama/tragedy stories, please check out my other story, The Angel In Hell. Once again, thank you so much! On with the show!

**Chapter Three: Punjabs and Tutus**

Raoul: Uh, guys…

Christine: What dear?

Raoul: My head still hurts.

(awkward pause…shattered by a definite…)

Erik: No trick, Sherlock! We just took muscle relaxers, what do you think we should feel like!

Meg: (dreamily) Relieved…

(All stare at her)

Carlotta: Anywayz…What do we do now?

( The lights dim and a spotlight shines on Erik)

Erik :(shielding his eyes with his hand) What the?

Raoul: C'mon you're the smart one! What do we do?

Erik: (sarcastically surprised) Why Foppy, I thought you'd never admit to it!

Raoul: (being sarcastically surprised right back) Why…uh, Opera Ghost-y! I thought you'd never agree with me!

Erik: Agree with you? (Shiver) Oh, yes…Well, um…Why don't we all just sit down and…chat?

Christine: That sounds lovely! What a great idea!

(Erik smiles, widely at Christine and behind her back he mouths "fop" at Raoul who shakes a fist at him as they all sit down)

Meg: So…now what?

Raoul: Lets play Spin the Bottle! (Grabs Erik who pushes him away)

Erik: Leave me alone, you perverted ass!

Raoul: Okay, okay…Ho about we tell our life stories?

(Erik shrinks to the corner as the others agree and get into a circle)

Meg: I'll begin…Well, I was born in a small town in France where I was taken to the Opera Populaire when I was very young…and, um…yeah…

Erik: Well, I won't say that was boring but…that was boring.

Christine: Erik!

Carlotta: Now eetz mye turn! I waz born in a zmall town in Spain, and my Mama waz very poor zo I vowed to become a famous singer an give her money…zo, I worked very hard on cruise ships until I waz deescovered by an Opera Populaire scout an zo here I am now!

Christine: Where is your mother now?

Carlotta: I don know…

(An image of an old Spanish-Italian lady begging on the streets with a sign that says "My pathetic daughter lost her part to a damn chorus girl and now I'm flat broke" flashes in her mind)

Raoul: Now me! My mom died when I was born and my dad died when I was like 7. My brother spoiled me and now I married to Christine! I'm so happy…

(All smile and look at Christine)

Christine: Me? Well, okay. I was born-

Meg: actually Christine, we pretty much know your story. Y'know, with the Little Lotte and the Violin and the paintings and chocolate and stuff.

(They all mumble in agreement as all eyes shift to Erik)

Erik: Wha? Me? I'm sure you're not interested…

Phangirls: Yes we are!

Erik: Well, okay…My name's Erik and I

Raoul: Hi, Erik!

Christine: Honey, this isn't an AA meeting.

Raoul: Oh, but you told me he did morphine and opium and stuff.

Erik: (eye twitching) No I don't…anyway. I was born, my mom hated me, and I hated her. I ran away right into a gypsy fair where I was caged and called the living corpse until I killed my owner who, by the way, tried to rape me and-

Raoul: And…that was a girl right? Your owner?

Erik: No (embarrassed mumbling) It was a man.

Raoul: That's sick! This is like a deranged OC episode.

Erik: And I ran into a mason and his stupid daughter and (munch munch)…she was a stupid little brat who killed herself by falling into a crumbling stairwell. Then, I became (munch munch) …a magician in the Persian Court before running away from there and building the Opera (munch munch)...FOP!

Raoul: (munching on popcorn) I don't know where it came from, but it's yummy.

Erik: AUTHORESS!

Authoress: (whistling)

Erik: BuildingtheOperPopulaireandhidingunderituntilIsawChristineandyouknowtherest! (Gasps for air)

Meg: Well…that was intresting.


	4. ATTACK!

Mmmm…I'm eating a donut right now…mmm, donut…okay, that wasn't random! Anyway, thanx again for the awesome reviews! (Calls up some Phangirls) Girls! We have a situation! Here we go again!

**Chapter Four: ATTACK!**

(Later…)

Carlotta, Meg, and Christine: (Trying to cheer up Erik after telling his story)

The sun'll come out, tomorrow!

So ya gotta hang on till tomorrow…

Come what may!

TOMORROW! TOMORROW!

I"LL LOVE YA TO-

Erik: (sobbing) I think you've broken my ear drums!

Raoul: (with popcorn bucket on his head) Mmeh!(He falls over, eyes closed) Zzzzz…

Meg: Is he dead?

(Erik gathers up some confetti and a blow horn as Christine feels for a pulse)

Christine: He's asleep.

(Erik sighs and puts confetti and blow horn away)

Christine: You know guys, I'm actually pretty tired too.

Meg: Me too.

Carlotta: Me three.

Erik: Well, I suppose if we're stuck up here, we can have some what of a rest.

(They all curl up and fall asleep)

Meg: (tugging at Erik and talking in her sleep) Oh, Erik…

Erik: (Awake at once) Meg?...

Meg: I love you Erik….

Erik: (Looks around) Me?

Meg: Kiss me…

Erik: Umm….no.

Raoul: (suddenly awake) I think she has a mask fetish.

Erik: (trying to pry Meg off his leg) No kidding…

(Later…All are asleep…until)

Erik: Now what?...

(Faint boom as Erik stares at a small glass of water…It ripples with each boom)

Erik: Uh, guys…

Raoul: Five more minutes, Christine!

(Erik takes out his blow horn and blows it in Raoul's ears)

Erik: Wakey, wakey, fops a daisy.

Christine: What's gong on?

Meg: Yeah…

Carlotta: Cheese. (Randomness of yours truly)

Erik: There's this noise coming from the shaft and-

(There is a GIGANTIC CRASH as they all fall backward and a million hands reach into the elevator)

Erik: Oh, no…

Raoul: Could it be?

Christine: Why not?

Carlotta: Who could be mistaken?

Phangirls: ERIK! WE LOVE YOU! WE'LL SAVE YOU!

Erik: AHHH! (He falls to the floor)

(Raoul grabs Christine and holds her towards the Phangirls)

Raoul: Please! Take this sacrifice!

Christine: RAOUL!

Raoul: Oh, right…back, Simba, back!

(A phangirl falls through into the elevator; she is in a mask and has cornered Erik)

Phangirl: I love you, Erik!

Erik: I know, please! Go away!

(Carlotta grabs Phangirl and Christine walks over to her)

Christine:

Who is that shape in the shadows?

Whose is the face in the mask?...

(She removes the mask…It is…)

All: The Authoress!

Authoress: Yes, I'm afraid so…the truth is…I love you Erik. You're the man of my dreams.

(AWWWWW)

Phangirls: HE'S MINE!

Authoress: Oh, go away… (They disappear) Well, (to Erik) Good-bye, m'love… (She disappears)

(All stare at Erik)

Erik: Hummala, hummala, hummala…

All: Hummala, hummala, hummala….


	5. The Oscars yes, the naked gold statue aw...

For Clayphan16- Fop- a man affectedly fastidious in dress or deportment; a dandy….That was actually from the dictionary. Hmmm….

To all reviewers- (blushes) Oh, you guys! Truly, I love you all! I saw theOscars last night as you will see inthis chapter. And POTO was only up for, like, two? And Million Dollar baby won EVERYTHING? And was that Gerard Butler with Beyonce while she sang LearnTo Be Lonely? Sorry, I was going beserk.On with the show!

**Chapter Five: The Oscars(yes, the naked gold statue awards!)**

(Erik is banging his head on the wall, while the rest watch, Raoul looks for popcorn)

Raoul: Where the? (Raoul snatches popcorn from Baffled Seraph) Gimmie that back!

Meg: (to Erik) Are you okay?

Erik: What (bang) does (bang) it (bang) look (bang) like? (bang)

Raoul: Maybe he'll die and we can eat him like those soccer players in the plane crash in the snowy mountains!

Carlotta: Datz not funny.

Christine: Yes Raoul, this is serious. Erik is slowly beginning to lose his sanity and (looks around) He's our only hope.

Raoul: _Beginning!_

Carlotta: (points to floor) Whatz zat?

(All look to floor, Meg screams)

Erik: Don't tell me (bang) it's a rat.

Christine: No! It's a magazine!

Erik: (turns around) Wha? Where did that come from?

Authoress: Hiya!

(Erik gulps and crosses himself)

Meg: It's….US. US? What's that? And who is US?

Erik: The name of the magazine, child.

Raoul: No! US stands for…Underpaid Stupid…heads…?

Carlotta: (reading title) What'z an Ozcar? Ozcar Gold?

(Erik snatches magazine from him and they all peer over his shoulder at the pictures)

Meg: Who's the naked, gold statue? That's an Oscar? God, it's just a stupid gold plated piece of plastic.

Christine: Moving on, now…Johnny Depp? Gosh, he's-

Raoul: He's dreamy!

Christine: You're still married to me honey…

Erik: Get this- they've cut down the show by getting the nominees already onstage. Great. Now we can watch their dreams shrivel up and die before our eyes as they clap half heartedly. Honestly, they should just have trapdoors under the nominees and whoever doesn't win should be dropped…

Meg: And they're just giving out Oscars in the isle ways…

Raoul: (as if he were selling food at a baseball game) Get yer Oscars! Oscars here! Get 'um while they last!

(An image of Cate Blanchett flashes as she raises a finger. "I'll take one Best Supporting

Actress!")

Carlotta: Who performed ze songs?

Erik: Erm…Beyonce? Hey, there's a picture. (Reads caption) 'Beyonce shines as she performs Learn To Be Lonely, nominated for Best Original Song from the motion picture, 'Phantom of the WHAT!' PHANTOM OF THE OPERA! But, how did they…

Christine: How did they know? Who told them about this!

British Voice: Hello, characters of my award winning Broadway show!

Meg: Who said that!

B. V.: Why, me of course!

(A short man enters the elevator in a flying seat)

Raoul: Um, Mister. Who are you?

British man: Why, I'm Andrew Lloyd Webber! Your musical creator!

(All stare at him blankly)

A.L.W.: Y'see, I decided that I wanted to make a musical out of the famous book, so I gathered up me musical mates and we wrote the musical. Sure, we changed the Operas and cut out some scenes and changed the ending but tell that to the people at the Tonys!

(Checks his watch) My goddness, I'm late for a meeting with Joel Shumacher on our amazing, but not so great with the critics film. Well, cheerio! (he exits)

Raoul: So…he was our creator?

Erik: Pretty much…

Raoul: so, he was like…our God?

(Erik looks at Raoul and hits him over the back of the head)

Raoul: Owie…

A/N- I think it's kinda getting boring, so I'm holding a vote for the next chapter. It shall

be either…

Grantaire from Les Mis drops in and gets them all drunk and they party hardy.

The Crocodile Hunter makes a failed attempt to save them, gets trapped with them, and keeps calling Erik a "Little Beauty."

They find a way out.

You can automatically eliminate one of those answers…R&R!

P.S- I know I'm nagging you all, but…Check out my other fanfic, The Angel In Hell! You all rock!


	6. 'Ello Mates!

Thank you all for your reviews! I'd never thought it would get so many…on my _first_ humor... Thanks SOOO much!

Yay for Erin reviewing! I promise NO E/C…shudder…

Hmm…About the vote- I shall have the most voted for come first…

On with the show!

**Chapter Six: 'Ello, Mates!**

(Meg, Carlotta, and Christine are bouncing against the wall like their in an insane asylum, Raoul is flipping through the magazine and Erik is sitting alone, fiddling with his Punjab Lasso)

Erik: (sighs) I haven't killed anyone in a while. Not in… (Counts on fingers) 1, 2, 3 …

Raoul: (In hysterics) There's a sale at Pennys! (Looks at girls hurling themselves at the wall and joins them) I must go to Penny's! 10-70 off!

Girls:

I'm a dude.

He's a dude.

She's a dude.

And we're all dudes, hey!

I'm a-

Erik: Will you all stop that infernal stupidity and SHUT UP!

Carlotta: Eetz not like you're doing anysing!

Raoul: Yeah! You're just talking to yourself and messing with that lasso!

(Erik gets up and corners Raoul)

Erik: What? Like this? (Puts it around Raoul's neck) All_ you're_ doing is blabbering about sales and who Britney Spears is marrying and-

Christine: Stop! Stop! Can't you see this constant bickering is tearing us apart!

(There is a boom and through the top of the elevator falls a man holding onto a rope in a brown shirt and shorts)

Man: 'Ello mates! I've come to save you!

Erik: (Grabbing the man by the collar) You have come to rescue me from this madness? (Man nods and Erik hugs him, sobbing) Oh, thank you!

Man: No problem, mate. (Tugs on rope) I found them!

(Rope falls to the ground of the elevator. Attached is a sign reading, "Donut break. Be back in 10 minutes)

Man: God, I told them that there are NO DONUTS! They'll be searching this place for days! (Calms down and looks down at shoe) At least I have Grantaire…

Meg: Who?

Man: Oh, just the little man who lives in my shoe.

Erik: Have you been taking muscle relaxers?

Man: What?

Erik: Never mind…um, who exactly are you?

Man: Why, I'm the Crocodile Hunter!

(All stare blankly)

C.H.: Y'know…Animal Planet? Discovery Channel… (Sighs) Little Beauty?

Christine: Oh! You're the insane guy who holds snakes and tells us that a teaspoon of its poison is enough to kill 500 people!

C. H.: Erm, Yes that too…Why is the bloke in the mask banging his head on the wall?

Carlotta: Oh, he alwayz duz zat.

C. H.: (confused look but walks over to Erik) Hello, Little Beauty! Why are you banging your head on the wall?

Erik: (glares t him) Is that an insult? Are you insulting me? (Lassos Crocodile Hunter) Tell me, you stupid crazy Aussie, have you been trapped in an elevator? No. Have you been trapped in an elevator _with a bunch of idiots_? No! WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME A "LITTLE BEAUTY"!

C. H.: You're mighty good at that.

Erik: What? What?

C. H.: The lasso throwing.

Erik: (groans and resumes banging his head on the wall)

C. H: You might need some Advil if you keep doing that.

Erik: Oh, I've fallen for that one, before! Ask the fop!

(Crocodile Hunter looks at Raoul)

Raoul: (nervous laugh) Long story.

A/N- I'll ad more Grantaire and more "Little Beauties" to the next chapter. I used "The Dude Song" from Good Burger. Any ideas? Do tell… I could use your great ideas….now. I love you all! R&R!


	7. The Young and The Foppish

A/N- I'm very sorry this took so long to update! I went to go see the movie ROBOTS yesterday only because Ewan McGregor was a voice for one of the characters. His character was hot…for a robot. Anyways, that was random! Oh, by the way, Erik, you can lose a bunch of brain cells every time you bang your head like that.

Erik: (Using his fist for a microphone) If I were a rich girl, nanananananananananananananana! See, I'd have all the money…

Yep…he's gone….Well, on with the show!

**Chapter Seven: The Young and The Foppish**

Carlotta: You zed zere waz a man who lives in your shoe?

C.H.: Yeah, shela! I'll show you. (Pulls off shoe, looks in, and gasps) Grantaire! Who is that?

(Dramatic music as the others look in to find Grantaire with Jack Sparrow at a table…with little cups and saucers like one of those Polly Pocket sets)

Grantaire: Uhh…this isn't what it looks like.

C.H.: (close to tears…HA!) Oh, don't give me that! I let you live in MY shoe so Javert won't find you and you go and pull a stunt like this! I'm so hurt!

Jack Sparrow: No, really mate. I just came by for tea.

Christine: Is anyone else seeing this?

Raoul: Yeah, and I thought Erik was crazy! (Christine elbows him in the ribs) Ow! My ribs…hehe…I want my babybackbabybackbabybackbabyback….

(Later)

Meg: (In her thoughts) Do I like him?...Oh, no I don't!...Yes, I do! But how? He's a scary, obsessive, murderer…and yet…so sexy…

Authoress: He doesn't like you, Meg, now shut up.

Meg: (looks around) Are you my conscience?

Authoress: Uh…(high voice) Yeah, Meg, I'm your conscience and I say you don't like Erik! He doesn't like you!

Meg: I love him…but only on my own…

Authoress: Ahem.

Meg: I shall confess my love to him!

Authoress: No you shall not! There are too many Phangirls that would beat you up!

Meg: So?

(Authoress hits he in the face)

Meg: Oh, my nose! My nose!

Micheal Jackson: I know what you mean.

Authoress: Get out of my story and go back to Neverland or something.

Micheal Jackson: (sigh)

(Even later)

Erik; My head…hurts…

Authoress: I told you so.

Erik: (mocking voice) I told you so. God, I hate you!

Authoress: You mean you don't…like me?

Erik: Awww…You look like Dory from Finding Nemo. (Smiles) I liked Finding Nemo…Hey Mr. Grumpy Gills…

Authoress: Robots is good, too because Ewan McGregor's in it.

Erik: Erm…Okaaay…

(Awkward silence as Authoress picks up a magazine and flips through it)

Authoress: I love Johnny Depp….But NOT his girlfriend. She's a model…All prissy and perfect and STUPID!

Erik: Like the fop?

Authoress: Pretty much.

(Raoul slides across the floor and stops abruptly at Erik's side)

Raoul: You called? (Gets confused) Oh, wait…crap! I fell for it!

Erik: Oh, hey Foppio. We were just talking about how models remind us of you.

Raoul: (Eyes-sparkly, Voice-squeaky) Really?

Erik: That wasn't a compli…

(The "I'm Too Sexy" song stats up and Raoul tosses his hair, majestically)

Authoress: …..

Erik: I HATE THAT SONG!

Raoul: Do you really think I could become model?

Raoul Fans: He's sexy enough…

Authoress: Uh…sure Raoul! (Mumbled) Help me, Erik!

Erik: Er…yeah! You're a model just waiting to throw up!

Authoress: Erik! That's not what I meant!

(Raoul is unaware of the remark as he hugs himself and skips away)

Raoul: RICOLA!

Christine: Raoul, sweetheart, what are you doing?

Raoul: Christine1 I have dream to shoot for!

Christine: (excited) What?

Raoul: I'm gonna be a model!

(Christine gasps and looks around for the Authoress)

Authoress: Pay no attention to the pale girl hiding behind Erik.

Christine: You!

Meg: (holding her nose in place) You!

Carlotta: You! What? I only got two lines in this stupid chapter?

Raoul: Spinach!

Erik: me?

Authoress: Him?

Erik and Authoress: Them?

Others: You both!

C. H.: We are now watching the six idiots argue; soon this will lead to a fight for life and death. Look at them…Isn't it amazing? (All eyes shift slowly to him) It's absolutely astounding how they…what? It's my job!

To be continued…

A/N- This is hard to say…there will be ONE MORE CHAPTER. There I said it. Don't hate me because I still love you all! R&R!


	8. The Last Midnight

A/N- Sorry this took so long. I was hauled off to the beach and the only computer there was my dad's work one and the hotels. But, everyone was on the hotel's one. I even used it to check in with Fanfiction. I felt like I was spying on myself…For some reason. Anyway, thanks to the new reviewers and on with the show!

**Chapter Eight: The Last Midnight**

Authoress: Will everyone please shut up!

Meg: Why should we listen to you? (Points at Erik) You're as demented as _him_! (Goes all dreamy eyed and stupid like she's been hit by a tranquilizer) But, not as sexy!

Erik: (nervous laugh) Uh… (Squeaky voice) Help me…

Authoress: Way ahead of you! (Smacks Meg on the back of her head) Ha, I win!

Meg: You ruined my hair! DIE! (Punches Authoress)

Raoul: Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

Erik: Why are they fighting, this is…(Looks at Raoul) I feel the need to hit you. (He does)

Raoul: (Rubbing the back of his head) Owww….Owww…Owww… (Turns to Erik and points) You!

Erik: Bring it on Foppy!

Raoul: (Does "Karate Kid" pose) It's already been brung!...Crap…

(Erik throws his Punjab at Raoul who cleverly, yes cleverly, does the matrix move to dodge it)

Erik: Awesome…I mean damn.

(Raoul pulls the Punjab away from him and throws it on the ground. He then proceeds to run up to Erik and they cat fight)

Christine: This is ridiculous, isn't it Carlotta…Carlotta?

Carlotta: You stole myee part!

Christine: (sigh) Oh, get over-

Random Bell: DING!

(Carlotta body slams Christine as the Crocodile Hunter poses as the referee, counting how many seconds Christine is pinned)

Christine: Carlotta…I…can't…breathe!

Carlotta: Maybe now you won't sing!

Christine: Mep!

A Half an hour later…the elevator looks like World War 3 struck inside it and everyone is growing tired as their punches and cat fighting get more pathetic and prissy…Wait. Isn't cat fighting already pathetic and prissy? I don't wanna get technical, but don't you think-

Erik: (Folding his arms and tapping his foot, impatiently) Are you done?

Uhhh…sorry, bout that…go on.

Authoress: (panting) This is pointless…

(A giant bubble forms around her as she floats out of the elevator. Meg, not noticing her opponent's absence, head butts the wall)

Meg: (foaming at the mouth) DIE! Wait, she's gone… (Breaks into song) Good news! She's dead! The witch of the west is-

Carlotta: (Holding Christine in a headlock) Where deed she go?

Christine: Msjifhiujghujuii….

Carlotta and Meg: What?

Christine: Look at the buttons on the elevator!

(Erik refrains from his intense thumb war with Raoul to look at them.)

Erik: Are those…pictures?

Raoul: (suddenly noticing them) AHA! (Runs over and presses the one with the tree on it) Womping Willow!

(The elevator stops and opens to reveal a forest)

C.H. (A la Charlie on Lost) Where are we?

TO BE CONTINUED…..


	9. Into theWhah?

A/N- Yes, so I just found out a guy who I love went to my friend's birthday party and I was supposed to go but I had All-State chorus and now I am in a deep state of depression so this might get sad- wait, why do you care?

Audience: (shrugs)

Ah, well, I have assigned Raoul to hit me over the head with the Phantom of the Opera DVD if I get too sad.

Raoul: I'm on it! (Looks at DVD case) Hey, I'm hot!

By the way, I was watching an episode of Punk'd when I thought I'd say it was the last chapter so…yeah (Ashton Kutcher runs out with a camera) please…go away….

K: Sigh

….On with the show!

**Chapter Nine: Into the… Whah?**

(Everyone is looking around, confused)

Erik: I thought you said we'd be out by now! I'm missing The OC!...Did I just say that out loud?

Authoress: And I missed Magic Hair (the guy I love)… (Seeing Raoul) No. No, I'm fine…Anyways; you all are in 'Into the Woods.' You will now be visiting musicals from now on and until I run out of musicals, you are stuck in my story forever! (Scary organ music plays) Muah ha ha! (Puts pinkie to side of mouth)

(Suddenly, there is a huge crunch and the group looks around some trees to see some random people and a young woman with a cape on looking very sad)

Young woman:

(Singing)

No matter what you say…children won't listen

No matter what you know, children refuse to learn-

Raoul: Hello there! Yes, you…the singing one! Yes! What's going on?

Young Woman: Do you mind? I'm having a moment here? My 'daughter' just got crushed by a giant!

Raoul: (thrusting his arms in the air) Ahhhh! I wanna go home! (Starts to suck his thumb and looks at DVD case again) Phantom? God, the Phantom's hot too…Ah! Sick! Did I just say that out loud!

Christine: Jah…Might wanna give me that…duhvuhd case…

Authoress: Gang, this is the Witch. She's super pissed right now so don't know one a-go messing with her…for the sake of your life, don't do it.

(A little man runs in and looks all panicky at everyone)

Little Man: My wife just died!

Authoress: Wrong timing, Baker!

Meg: This musical is quite depressing…everyone dies (A Les Miserables tune echoes I the background and another young lady named Cinderella runs in, followed by Little Red Riding Hood and Jack)

All: His wife just died! (Points at Witch) It's your fault!

Witch: Pah! Screw you all and take my magical beans with you!

Raoul: Beans! Lovely, lovely beans!

(The Witch screams and disappears in a wisp of smoke)

Erik: She needs some Prozac.

Raoul: Ha! Look who's talking!...But, I take pills. Special pills that tell the evil monkey in my head to stop playing the symbols.

(All look to Christine)

Christine: He's ADD.

Raoul: Pretty, shiny things…

Authoress: Whoops! Time's up! Onto the next musical!

(Everyone is sent through one of those Twilight Zone spinning thingys and they land in a city of…green)

Erik: Where are we….now?


	10. One Short Day

A/N- Thank you all for the reviews! I missed them oh so much! (Hugs self) By the way, I loved your dream Baffled Seraph…Ashton Kutcher makes me laugh so hard…Oh, and don't worry…they'll get back into the elevator eventually….On with the show!

**Chapter Ten: One Short Day**

(Let's see…Ah, yes, ahem, the gang is in a city of green and pretty shiny things)

Raoul: Yay! I love shiny things! (Does Happy Dance)

Others: We know.

Carlotta: (Ha! You probably thought she disappeared!) Zo…where are exzactly?

C.H: (Ha again! You probably thought he disappeared too!) I don't know shela…but over there is one pretty snake…

(He sneaks up on a green girl in black holding a broom and pounces on her)

Green Girl: What in the name of Oz are you doing!

C.H: Oh…you're not a snake…you're just green…

(A blonde girl in pink runs over and helps the green girl up)

Blonde: (Think Valley Girl…I love making fun of Glinda) Like, what are you doing to my friend, dude...?

Christine: I wonder where she got that dress, Raoul…Raoul?

Raoul: (staring at Glinda) Gosh, you're pretty…

Glinda: (twirling her hair and giggling) Like thanks, sexy.

Erik: (Looking at Elphaba, the green girl…duh) She's green…She's a freak just like me! I am not alone!

Authoress: (A la "Into the Woods") No one is alone…

Erik: (Shiver)

(Elphaba taps Glinda on the shoulder and holds the broom out to her)

Glinda: Get that thing away from me! It probably has…y'know… cooties on it!

Elphaba: Shut up. (Goes into character mode) Glinda, come with me! Think of what we can do…together! (Breaks out of character) Well that was cheesy.

Authoress: No, it wasn't! I love this musical!

Elphaba: (sigh) Unlimited…Together we're unlimited…Together we'll be the-

(Nessarose does a wheely into the scene…wrong timing, anyone?)

Nessarose: I LOVE BOQ!

Authoress: (Singing) Nessa?

Nessa: Yes?

Authoress: Uh, Nessa

I've got something to confess-a

Reason why, well, why I hate your character

Now, I know it isn't fair

Nessa: Oh…Authoress, I know why.

Authoress: You do?

Nessa: But I really do not care

You're s'possed to feel sorry for me

Now get it right

Authoress: No! Because…because…

Because you are so terrible

Nessa: But Boq thinks I'm wonderful

And we deserve each other-

Erik: This is like watching a train wreck in slow motion…

Glinda: I'm not getting on the broom! It's gross and besides…I've got Fiyero and his sweet ride!

Elphaba: Whatever, prep. (Music crescendos as she flies into the air, belting notes beyond my glorious belting dreams)

Elphaba: So if you care to find me

Look to the Western sky

As someone told me lately

Ev-

Erik: We can see your underwear!

Elphaba: (crossing her legs) Everyone deserves a chance to fly!

Raoul; I see London I see France!

Elphaba: (embarrassed) Please stop! This is my big song!

And nobody in all of Oz

No wizard that there is or was

Is ever gonna bring…

MEEEEEEE DOOOOWWNNNNNNN!

Erik: She's brilliant! (He's in lurve…awwww)

Raoul: HOLY CRAP!

Glinda: Like, I hope your happy….loser.

Elphaba:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

(The gang is once again sucked into a Twilight Zone spinny thingy and dumped into the middle of a French Revolution….with a BIG RED FLAG.)

Raoul:…No shiny things….


	11. I Can't Think of a Title

A/N- (falls to knees) I'm so very sorry that this has taken **SOOOOOOOOO** long! (Crickets) Hello? Is anyone out there? (Erik enters with a mop and a bucket)

Erik: They all left years ago.

Authoress: (Looks at the date) OhmyGod!

Erik: Where have you been? After that Wicked chapter you just disappeared…

(A dark shadowy figure looms next to the Authoress)

: She was with me.

Authoress: Um, who exactly are you?

: …I am vengeance…I am the knight…..

(Authoress looks at watch)

: I am…Batman!

Authoress: Batman! What are you doing in my Fanfic!

Batman: Because you just saw the Batman Begins movie and I am now your new object of obsession.

Erik: Nice suit.

Authoress: Batman, I'm trying to begin my fanfic. Can you just-

Batman: I'm not Batman (pulls off suit) I'm Bruce Wayne.

(Erik looks confused)

Authoress: Bruce Wayne? The billionaire?

Bruce Wayne: No, I'm (pulls off…Oh, never mind) Christian Bale.

Authoress: (Drools)

(Erik sighs and mops up the drool, squeezing it in the bucket)

Erik: Stay a while. I've been here half a year…

ON WITH THE SHOW!

**Chapter Eleven: I Can't Think Of A Title**

So…where was I…..Oh, yes! So, our heroes have just been sucked into a giant twilight zone thingamabob and have been dumped right next to a giant barricade…So…yeah…

Erik: (Rubbing head) Owww…my head…

Christine: (Rubbing arm) Owwww….my arm…

Raoul: (Rubbing leg) Owwww…my big toe!

Erik: (Rolls eyes) Anyways… (Looks around) Erm…where are we?

Elphaba: I think we're in France.

Erik: (blushing) Elphie…What are you doing here?

Elphaba: (shrugs)

Authoress: I brought her here! Du-du-du-Dar!

Erik: Wait…Aren't you…um…Jealous?

Authoress: Hahahahahahaha! No. Y' see, now that I have Mr. Bale over here, I've found a new guy…So…Be gone.

Erik: Wait, so you're just gonna dump me? Just like that? After all we've been through?

Authoress: (Drooling)

Erik: (Shaking a fist) I thought it meant something to you! (Looks over at Elphie and pulls her close to him) C'mon Elphie! We'll just go where we're appreciated!

(Erik walks away with Elphie until a bunch of guns go off)

Erik: Um…Let's go over _that way_ where we're appreciated.

Meg: Miss Authoress Lady…Where are we?

Authoress: (Drool) Humala, humala, humala…Whah? Oh! You're in the Wonderful World of Les Miserables! "The Most Popular Musical of Our Time" where everyone dies! Yay!

Carlotta: Zat's uplift-tink.

(Suddenly, everyone notices a bunch of men with guns by the barricade staring at them)

Raoul: (Lifts hands into the air) Don't shoot! (Leans over to Christine and whispers) I'll distract them while you run. (He pulls on a hula skirt and starts dancing) Uga-chaka! Uga-chaka! Uga-chaka!

(Men at barricade look at each other, confused)

Christian Bale: Does he take medication?

Authoress: (shrugs) If he does, it doesn't work too well.

(Suddenly, a young girl staggers up the barricade into a revolutionary's arms. She has blood all over her)

Young girl: (singing)

Don't you fret

Monsieur Marius

I don't feel any pain

A little fall of-(Stops singing)

What is that man doing in a skirt?

Raoul: Day-O! Me sah Day-O! Daylight come and me wan go-

Carlotta: (Looks scared)

Marius: Hey man! Cut it out! Eponine here is dying and…I honestly could care less.

(He gets up and walks away to daydream about his "Beloved")

Eponine: Marius! I'm dying! Does no one care? You're supposed to feel sorry for the underprivileged little outcast beggar girl!

Christian Bale: Why does every outcast's name in your story begin with an E?

Authoress: (Shrugs)

Eponine: Well then, screw you! (GagChokeDie)

Meg: Well…that was exciting!

Random Revolutionary: Hey…wait a minute! Are those guys Revolutionaries?

Revolutionaries: Erm…no.

Random Revolutionary: Well, then, they must be against us! Angry Mob!

Raoul: (Pulls out a ukulele) Now, I know we can solve this like civilized human- (A shot is fired) Well, fine then! (He hurls the ukulele at the men) Taste my Hawaiian rage! (He starts to throw pineapples at them until Christine grabs him and runs) Ah!

Authoress: I think we've disturbed this musical long enough! C'mon Christian!

(Once again they are sucked into a Vortex-y-ish thingy and dumped into a world of King Arthur, a round table, and the knights that say, "Nee!"

Meg: I think we're in Spamalot.

(GASP!)


	12. The Logic of the Coconut

(Dear God, you all are probably pissed at me for taking so long; I understand, but I have good reasons:

I was/am in a play.

I'm a terrible procrastinator.

I'm going to replace Christian Bale with Johnny Depp because he makes a sexy Willy Wonka/Stop-motion character.

That is all…. (Sighs)Ok, where was I? Oh, yes! Spamalot! On with the show! (Keeps hand at the level of her eyes in case a reader decides to Punjab her)

**Chapter Twelve: The Logic of the Coconut**

Erik: (fiddling with Punjab and noticing Authoress slinking in) Damn, that took long! You suck at updating don't you? (Noticing Elphaba lying on the floor with Christine and Meg)

Raoul: Guys, wake-

Erik: (Clasping his hand over Raoul's mouth) Wait, wait…. (Takes out a camera and takes a picture of the girls) Okay, I'm done… (To Raoul) Go on!

Raoul: Umm…Guys wake up!

Christine: (Yawning) Well, it's about damn time! What took you so long?

Meg: Yeah. We've gone to go see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and Corpse Bride about 20 times each! (Aside) Both were good, I recommend them.

Elphaba: (Stretching) Yeah, that Johnny Depp is hot.

Erik: (Clears throat)

Elphaba: Not as sexy as you, darling…

Erik: (smiles broadly)

Authoress: (does a Hoedown offstage) Pieces…Pieces…Pieces of me…

Raoul: wait! We need you to pass the story along! With out you we'll be lost forever! (Erik and Elphaba roll their eyes) Think of your baby! (All gasp as Raoul shoots his hand up to his mouth) I didn't say anything. I didn't say anything…

Authoress: (Runs back onstage and slides up to Elphaba and Erik) Wha?

Erik: Well, you've been gone for a pretty long time and-

Raoul: Lalalalala-I can't hear you-laalalalalalalallalalallalalla-I'm not listening!

Authoress: I get the picture. (A la 'Astronaut's Wife') They're gonna be pilots. Just like their father….

(Awkward pause)

Ok! On with the story! So, you've fallen into the musical Spamalot! …..Speed…Marker…and…Action! (All stand silently) Do something! No, Raoul, don't pick your nose sweetheart…Would the lovely couple move a little to the left…No, my left; you're blocking Meg and Christine. No! Meg! Christine! Why are you hiding? Get Meg her puffer, somebody! (Puts head in hands, hopelessly until she hears a noise) Doth my ear deceive me? Do I hear the clopping of hooves?

(All turn to find a bunch of men riding imaginary horses with little men behind them carrying big bags of supplies and knocking coconuts together)

Erik: What the Hell! (Elphaba hits him) Sorry, dear…bad for the baby, I know…

Johhny Depp: Is that woman green? Why is that guy wearing a mask? (Goes in a corner and sits in the fetal position, rocking back and forth) I'm so confused…

Meg: (squinting) Is that Willy Wonka? (Gasps) It is! Do the 'you're really weird' line!

Johnny Depp: You're really weird.

Christine: No Wonka voice, but extremely convincing!

Johnny Depp: That's because I meant it literally.

(One of the men with a crown on an imaginary horse halts and addresses our heroes)

Man with a crown on an imaginary horse: Halt! Who goes there? Is that woman green? Why is that man wearing a mask?

(One of the other men dismounts off of his imaginary horse to try and join Johnny in the corner)

Man with a crown on an imaginary horse: Sir Robin! Get back here!

Sir Robin: Sorry, King Arthur (A/N Nobody would actually say that, but I'm getting tired of writing Man with crown on an imaginary horse…)

Raoul: King Arthur, as in…_King Arthur_?

Authoress: Yes. Only he's funnier.

Raoul: All hail Funny King Arthur!

(Suddenly, a scantily clad woman with her scantily clad posse enter the scene)

Scantily Clad Woman: who are these people, Arthur? (Squinting) Is that woman green? Why is that man wearing a mask?

(Elphaba and Erik frown and join Johhny in the corner)

King Arthur: I do not know, Lady of the Lake. Perhaps we should-

Sir Lancelot: Kill them! Ahhhhh! (He runs after them with his sword)

Authoress: (Quickly) Our time here is done! Let us make haste!

(Yet again, our heroes are sucked into a time warp and dropped off in a foggy London town that looks like any other foggy London town…Alright, that's giving you no hints; it's Jekyll and Hyde.)

Raoul: Hey…hey, guys! Guess what I managed to get! (He clicks two coconut halves together, creating that same horse gallop sound) Hahahahahaha! I am fascinated!

Meg: (Grabbing Authoress) Kill me, just kill me now!

To be continued….hopefully….


	13. What's a Facade?

Hey everybody! Well, I just want to give you a heads up in this chapter because there is a character you might not know coming into it. He is called Magic Hair (that's not his real name) and he is a beautiful man that my friend and I are obsessed with because he is wonderfully talented and hot. So…yes. He has a cameo, so just go with it and enjoy…

**Chapter Thirteen: What's a Façade?**

Christine: (Looking around, nervously) Where are we now? I'm getting tired of this nonsense….RAOUL! ENOUGH WITH THOSE BLASTED COCONUTS! YOU ARE DRIVING ME AND EVERYONE ELSE TO THE BRINK OF MADNESS! NOW STOP, BEFORE I TAKE THOSE COCONUTS AND SHOVE THEM UP YOUR-

Erik: (Covering ears) Woman! I taught you how to sing, not scream! If you keep doing this your vocal chords give up on you! (Notices Raoul, sitting on the ground, clicking the coconuts together happily) Just try me, Foppy.

Raoul: (Continues to click coconuts together just to annoy him. He notices that this has lost its fun while he halfheartedly continues before stopping and setting them on the ground, sadly)

Johnny Depp: (Sitting in the corner, sucking his thumb and trying to sing) Willy Wonka…Willy Wonka…The…amazing…choco…lateir….Do do do….

Meg: (Notices Carlotta) Whoa! Carlotta…We thought you were dead. Where have you been?

Authoress: I locked her in a tower without company for four months, and then I blinded her prince and banished her to a desert where she had little to eat and again no company…and then bore twins… (Cackles)

Meg: Ooookay. (Carlotta tries to speak, but fails) What's wrong with you?

Authoress: I turned her into a newt! (Everyone stares at her, then Carlotta) It got better…No; I turned her into a _mute_, so she won't annoy anyone.

Raoul: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha! (Carlotta gives him a look of death) Oh…um, I mean, "Oh, how sad."

(Suddenly, they see a man with long hair in the distance, groping a young woman…)

Christine: Um, public displays of affection….eww. Authoress, what's going on?

Authoress: (flipping through script) one moment…Ah, yes! The "Horror" scene; Well, Elphaba is supposed to say, "Jinkies, gang. Let's check it out." And, of course, being the gullible little kiddies you are, you "check it out." Well, go on, Elphie, say it, say it! (Waves broomstick in front of her face) Action!

Elphaba: Erm… (With false enthusiasm) Jinkies, gang. Let's check it out!

(Our heroes walk together like herded sheep up to the couple who stop their duet to acknowledge them)

Woman: Oh, hello there.

Man: Who the Hell are you?

Johnny: Good morning starshine! The earth says hello!

Authoress: Hahahaahahahahahha….ha….ha…Go on! See who the man is! Do it! Do it do it do it do it do it do it! (Hands Meg a flashlight) Go on! Shine it in his face!

(Meg aims flashlight in the man's face, only for it be…)

Authoress: AHHHHHHHHHHHH! IT'S SEBASTIAN BACH! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES AND PANIC LIKE CHICKENS WITH THEIR HEADS CUT OFF!

(Everyone panics while Erik hands Sebastian Bach a mask and runs off with the others. Authoress freezes the scene with her magical…freezy frame…power thingy… Well, fine then; come up with a better name!)

Authoress: (addressing readers) There has been a casting mistake for the character of Jekyll/ Hyde. All of us at the My Little World or Randomness Co. regret this mistake and will tune you back into this scene where the character will be played by the proper man- Magic Hair, with all his wonderful glory! (Phone rings and she answers it) Hello?...Why yes, this is she…No, I'm not high!...Well, I-…Screw you! (Hangs up) Get back to the scene.

(Freeze frame power stops and we return to see the girls gawking over the man- Magic Hair- while he is holding the woman- Lucy)

Meg: (Drooling) Gee, you're pretty…

Christine: In a strange, demonic, mass murderer sort of way…

(Johnny Depp is waving his arms for attention before slinking back into his corner)

Magic Hair: You're supposed to be scared! Besides, I don't have long hair anymore! (Takes out knife) Huh? C'mon! You've got to be a teeny bit scared, right?

Girls: Nung…

Magic Hair: Well, I- (He starts going into spasms and lets go of Lucy while he flops around on the floor. Raoul points at him and laughs until Magic Hair gets up and puts his hair in a pony tail, brushing himself off)

Magic Hair: (Notices the girls staring at him) Oh…um…Hello…and goodbye. (Runs off into the night)

Girls: Nooooo! (They begin to run after him until the Authoress signals the vortex to suck them all up again and drop them off in a semi-dumpy apartment complex where they are greeted by a bunch of puppets)

Elphaba: Dear, God, no… We're in Avenue Q…


End file.
